10.000 B.c.

[Winkeladvokat]

By far the worst of Emmerichs flicks yet, I'm afraid. To call "10.000 B.C." 'mindless' would be a grave understatement, but that was to be expected, given the previews.

What's really surprising though, is the utter lack of spectacle. Sure, the mammoths look utterly gorgeous, this is some of the finest effects work I've ever seen (alas, this doesn't really hold true for the rest of the creatures), but what little there is was already shown in the trailers and the extended clip of the hunt. What's missing adds up to a few minutes at best - including the (utterly lame) attack by the birds and the scenes with the sabertooth.

Possible mild spoilers ahead....

Actually, scrap the sabertooth. Apart from some quick shots of the beast struggling in water and running away, what has been shown in the trailer is all there is. Honestly.

Although visually appealing, the showdown is anything but satisfying (again, most of it is in the previews), part of which is due to the fact that Emmerich not only enters "Stargate"-territory (and almost goes the whole distance, the only thing missing is actually showing the ring) but in the last minute even resorts to magic.

So, even taking into account the fact that fare like this must not be approached with anything like "logic" or even "plausibility" in mind (which worked fine for "Independence Day", which I still enjoy), this movie is simply utterly boring. There is nothing to fill the huge gap between the opening hunt and the less-than-rousing showdown to merit a viewing. Not even on Blu-ray I'm afraid.

[alexsm]

what a pity, i hoped this would be good. The trailer looked fine, and it's an Emmerich film. Well, he isn't a great director but he made ID4 (one of the movies of my childhood), Stargate and The Patriot.

[uraydo]

from the beginning this movie seemed ill conceived to me.

[guitarded]

The trailers were pathetic.......if it were truly a 10000 BC, there would be proper cavemen in the film......not 20th century human beings.......Not planning to see this movie

[barricade505]

My seven year old was excited about the trailer though...LOL.

[Devastator]

I'm confused on the story.
So a guy gets propelled into the past like a Stargate kinda thing or is it like "a hero will rise" kinda deal?

[Winkeladvokat]

@Devastator

MAJOR SPOILERS

The story in a nutshell: A caveman has his girlfriend kidnapped by bandits which turn out to belong to a highly advanced race (either from space or Atlantis as the movie hints but not actually reveals) that is building the pyramids with the help of slaves and mammoths. Caveman-hero follows the kidnappers across the continent, gathering friends from various African tribes (simply by not being instantly eaten by the sabretooth whom he freed earlier which wins him respect and makes him a chosen one of prophecy) and ultimately freeing the slaves and slaying the evil leader (who is never fully revealed) thus instantaneously ending trouble - with the exception of the "leader" of the gang of kidnappers who doesn't like to share his price and kills the girl.

Luckily, the old wise woman in the cavemans village has magical powers and dies, sending her last breath over thousands of miles to Egypt, reviving the girl. Freed slaves give caveman corn seeds, final picture is of him gently stroking the corn he planted at home. And this still sounds more exciting than it is on screen, believe me.

There is subplot about the heros father having made the same trip before in an attempt to save his tribe from starving (which the tribe obviously didn't, although the father never returned, making his son an outcast) but it really, really added nothing whatsoever to the story, just helped to drag it out even further.

[Devastator]

Thnx man seems a rather boring movie. Might be a good $5 Tuesday movie though.

[Winkeladvokat]

@Devastator

Is that something you actually also have in the US? A 5$-Tuesday? I never noticed when on vacation there, at least not in the L.A./San Diego/Palm Springs-area.

[xAgonyxScenex]

Emmerich should really stick with what he does best....sci-fi

[Devastator]

We have $5 Tuesdays here in Louisville, Ky. The theaters here on the weekdays are as vacant as a cemetery. Its the economies fault. Most jobs here are 1st shift and no one wants to pay about $10 for an evening weekday showing.

[Simon]

Can't wait to see it next week.
The funny (and sad) thing is, that although Emmerich is German he's the only director besides Bay who still makes "big popcorn Hollywood blockbusters". Whenever I think about it, I just don't get it. Why aren't there any more people who still make "big stuff"?
Anyway, seams this isn't gonna be that great? We'll see.

[barricade505]

I have a feeling,if I go to this I will find myself picking and grooming my wife's hair mid-way through the movie.Hopefully she cleans me next.....

[alexsm]

The funny (and sad) thing is, that although Emmerich is German he's the only director besides Bay who still makes "big popcorn Hollywood blockbusters". Whenever I think about it, I just don't get it. Why aren't there any more people who still make "big stuff"?

You also have Mr Verbinski, he hasn't any filming style/personality, but all his films are excelent paced.

Making "Big popcorn Hollywood Blockbusters" is not so easy as many Critics and people think. Is not just "throwing money".

[Winkeladvokat]

@Simon

What difference does it make wether Emmerich's German? Ever heard of Wolfgang Petersen? Or Michael Ballhaus for that matter?

And I wouldn't say he and Bay are the only directors doing big popcorn fare. What about Sam Raimi, Gore Verbinski, Steven Spielberg, Peter Jackson, James Cameron, Brett Ratner or the aforementioned Wolfgang Petersen to name just a few?

[Devastator]

You lose 100000 points of cool for mentioning Brett Ratner with great directors. lol

[Winkeladvokat]

@Devastator

Hard to argue with, I guess

But shouldn't those movie-goers be punished who helped put Ratner on that list? He may be a talentless hack, but he gets to spend the same kind of budgets as they do. And even for the disastrous third "X-Men", people went out in droves.

[barricade505]

What the heck!!???Third X-men movie??What was that one about?I'm confused,I musta' missed it.

[Trailbreaker]

When I first found out about 10,000 BC I was like "Finally, a caveman movie! YAY!" But when I found out about them speaking English and that advanced civilization thingy, I have no plans to see it.

If one is going to make a movie about cavemen, make it about real cavemen.

[r-type]

Whew. I just fell on this grenade called 10,000 B.C.

*dusts off*

Who did Emmerich piss off?

Damn.

[alexsm]

Emmerich is a genius, he spent 75M $ in an amazing collection of WTF, ORLY, OMG and LOL moments.

The movie adaptation of the Age of Empires game. Pure Greatness.

[r-type]

Emmerich is a genius, he spent 75M $ in an amazing collection of WTF, ORLY, OMG and LOL moments.

The movie adaptation of the Age of Empires game. Pure Greatness.

Definately. Wink was not lying. This was crap.


On the plus side I got to see the new Speed Racer trailer. Those full focus cameras are really cool. The action is catoony, but the colors are amazing.

[Bumblebee1983]

What the heck!!???Third X-men movie??What was that one about?I'm confused,I musta' missed it.

Don't worry, you missed a shitty movie.

It REALLY pissed me off. I'm pissed that Ratner messed with my childhood heroes like that.

On the other hand, I thank Bay for not damning Transformers the way Ratner messed with X-Men.

Back on topic: when I heard that Emerich was doing this film....I was like....huh? My boyfriend's dad wants to see it....maybe we'll go tonight and if so, I'll let ya know my thoughts on it.

[Winkeladvokat]

Btw: "10.000 B.C." has bombed at the German boxoffice, causing the number of admissions to fall below two million for the weekend for the first time since December 2007...

[barricade505]

no surprise.......